<tired of the see saw mentality … photo by Hand>
Sometimes we fall into a dark season for an indefinite period. Hours … days … weeks … months … years. Falling suggests going into a dark place versus looking toward the light.
Why do many of my writings reflect this issue? The answer is I write from my heart … and flirting with darkness is my current condition. I do trust Him. But my struggle is completely trusting Him … placing every detail of my life into His hands … and laying it all at the foot of the cross.
I am not there, yet.
Is choosing darkness a choice? Absolutely. On the other hand, there are many issues in life we have no choice or control over. Would you have ever chosen your fill in the blank life changing event? Probably not.
It’s ironic that the one thing we are able to control during tough times is often the one we allow to spiral completely out of control.
And that is … our minds … and how we respond to challenging times. Oftentimes, the circumstance itself takes over our minds.
Hence, the battle begins.
My mind is like a rocking chair or perhaps a see saw . Back and forth, up and down, back and forth, up and down … ‘I’ve got this. I don’t have it. Here God, you take it. I want it back now because You aren’t working fast enough. Actually I didn’t have it after all. God please take this from me.’
It is an exhausting way to live.
Yet … there are a few people (a very few) who share a common thread during tough times … they live in peace and in rest. ‘Maybe there difficulty is not as bad as mine …’ <Yes it is. I could write a book on devastating events I have seen over the past six years.>
The conquerors versus the conquered … the victors versus the victims …
“The Sovereign Lord is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to tread on the heights.” Habakkuk 4:19
These few people … have been strengthened and developed, with a character firmly in place during turbulent times … while the rest of us often crumble over the same or lesser load.
The difference? What is the difference?
The answer is they are cloaked in a mature, wise, unshakable faith … filled with abundant Grace. They have learned to walk, breathe, and soak in the continuing awareness of God’s presence and power. They focus on the One who is sovereign, author of life, our Deliverer, King of Kings, our Salvation, the Resurrection and the Life, the Vine, the Way, the Wisdom of God, Counselor, true Light, our Hope … their Alpha and Omega.
Isaiah 40:31 says “but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”
How could we not all have that same peace when we serve such a mighty God, no matter the depth of our trial?
I strive for their level of Wisdom. But, today I am still … back and forth … up and down. “I know I’m not where I need to be, but thank God I’m not where I used to be.” I am pressing toward surrendering everything to Him, so that I can live in complete peace and rest, no matter the circumstance. I want what they have.
<pressing toward the Light>
Where are you today in your walk?
On our journeys, we must speak and focus on His character and His word, over and over and over … which then starts to replace the up and down, and back and forth mindset. It takes perseverance and purposeful action, daily.
Pressing toward Joy thought of the day: be aware of His presence, His power and just how mighty He is.
<Next blog … pretty soon … traveling to San Fran tomorrow … prayers requested for Wisdom over upcoming medical decisions … placing it in His hands>